this past february my mom, my aunt and i drove my grandfather down to florida to see his sister. he's 82 and she is 85. they hadnt seen each other in over 30 years. i hadnt spent much time with my grandfather in the past ten years since he moved farther away. the image i had in my head was from a ten year old child's point of view. he was grandpa. quiet and a little gruff but i knew that he was strong and would always be there to make things better.
when we got to my great-aunt's house they were talking and she was asking him about the family and about his late wife. my grandmother died before i was born. he never remarried or found anyone else. it was evident all through my childhood how much he loved her. when my great-aunt asked about how she died my grandfather made up some vague story about how she suddenly got sick. he said the doctors didnt know what it was and after she was in the hospital for a few days she died.
my mom, my aunt and i all looked at each other confused but didnt say anything.
my grandmother died of lung cancer. there was nothing sudden about it. she was in and out of the hospital for months.
it suddenly became clear why the entire 20 hour drive there my grandfather had been repeating the same stories. he couldnt remember anything else. or even the fact that he had already told us.

she was the love of his life and his memories of her are fading.